The Tears of the Clown

Everyone has that one "celebrity" whose death hits us harder than it should.
For many in my generation, it was Kurt Cobain. River Phoenix was a big one for others. Len Bias was a great cautionary tale for kids my age.
For me, however, none of them held a candle to Robin Williams. His death hurt. And a week out, it still hurts.
Aladdin is on my TV for the second time this weekend, as Disney is playing the movie in tribute on its various networks. And as much as my son and I laugh while watching, I know we're going to get to the end. And then he'll be gone again, with the heroic, but now tragic, line of "Genie, you're free." And the tears will come once more.
It's hard thinking that a celebrity would cause that kind of emotion. After all, it's not like I knew the man. He was just someone I saw on my TV and movie screens.
But he was more. From Mork to Popeye to the Genie to Mrs. Doubtfire, his manic genius was a huge part of the laughter in my life. How many times did you fire off one of his one liners from a movie? We quote his interactions with the Sgt. Major in "Good Morning, Vietnam" to this day.

Sgt. Major Dickerson: [Pointing to his rank insignia] What does three up and three down mean to you, airman?
Adrian Cronauer: End of an inning?

And it wasn't just those acting roles.
His standup comedy was legendary. Anytime he was on a talk show, it was worth stopping to watch -- even on Jay Leno's show. Look them up -- he's never not funny. I wore out a copy of his Live at the Met performance on cassette tape, and got a second one because I had to have it to listen to in my car. He would crack up fellow comics with his material. Track down some of his Comic Relief bits, as Billy Crystal and Whoopi Goldberg tried -- and mostly failed -- to keep up. And then there was his bit "Inside the Actor's Studio" when he did a 10-15 minute improv riff using a woman's scarf. Epic.
Was everything he did great? No, and not all laugh out loud funny. But he still came back to laughter. And it was always great to see. Even his return to TV last fall on "The Crazy Ones" was funny. But it didn't play to Middle America, and so it didn't get a second season. 
And so I'm left to grieve this man I never met. Like the grieving process for those closest to us, the feeling will pass. But for now, I'd expect a few tears whenever I see his picture or run across him on video. RIP Robin. Thanks for the laughter.